REUSED CHIPS AT THE MEXICAN RESTAURANT

     Have you ever wondered if Mexican restaurants reused the chips leftover from previous patrons? I actually never wondered that because I always gave the restaurants the benefit of the doubt.

     Well, you might want to think twice before going to town on a restaurant's free chips and salsa. Not only will they make you so full you won't be able to eat your actual food, they also might be someone else's leftovers. Let that sit for a few minutes. Gross, right? 

     Su Casa, a Mexican restaurant in Michigan, has been accused of reusing uneaten chips and salsa and serving it to other customers. The mother of a 16-year-old busser at the restaurant, Kristie Bowie, revealed Su Casa's practices last week on Facebook. According to the post, the restaurant's management told Bowie's daughter that she should not "throw away the salsa, chips, etc. that come back that 'looked' like they haven't been touched." A policy that sure, prevents food waste, but promotes feelings of nausea. 

     Bowie's daughter confronted the restaurant's owner about the chip policy. When he admitted it was true, the teenager put in her notice. The owner then allegedly belittled the teenager telling her she had no common sense and "asked her if she is such a clean freak, why was her apron dirty?"

     When confronted by the media about the allegations, the restaurant owner claimed he didn't know what he was doing was wrong. He said, "I thought it was okay." He said that he has not learned his lesson and will throw out all unused food moving forward. So, regardless of his actions moving forward, what about the patrons in the past? And the ones who got sick from this practice? Are there other restaurants doing this as well? It's disgusting!

     The practice of reusing already touched food is potentially unsafe and a little disturbing for germaphobes around the world. A 2009  study found that double-dipping a chip into a dip like salsa or cheese can transfer bacteria from the dipper's mouth to the bowl. Based on these numbers, if restaurant salsa is reused within 120 minutes, patrons could be consuming strangers' bacteria. Even worse than that, re-serving food can also increase the risk of contracting viruses like hepatitis A, which is often transmitted though contaminated food. This means if an infected person touches food, like free chips or a bread basket, and the food is then re-served to another table, members at the second table could be at risk for contracting the virus.

     What's the moral of the story here? Stick to non-communal foods that you don't suspect will be re-purposed. Maybe, you can load up on margaritas before you eat. This way, you won't even realize you're being contaminated. Oh, God! Does it even pay to eat out anymore? Like I asked before, how many other restaurants use this practice? Disgusting!

NO HORSING AROUND

     Okay, before I even start writing this blog, I need to say that I DO have an alibi. When I was in Lancaster, PA this weekend for a wedding on a farm, there were no horses harmed on that farm, nor were there any mini-horses on the farm.

     That being said, a Lancaster County man was charged with burglary and having sexual intercourse with an animal, after a eyewitness reported seeing a suspicious man coming out of a barn in West Cocalico Township earlier this month. 

     The witness reported a license plate number, and according to Ephrata police say that 21-year-old Travis L. Wagner of Rheinholds, PA was arrested after the license plate was tracked back to him. The incident occurred on August 16 in the evening. The witness stated that a vehicle parked near a barn, and the driver went inside for a short time, then left. 

     When police interviewed Wagner, he admitted going into the barn to have intercourse with miniature horse housed in there. He said that he found the horse "super-sexy" and just couldn't help himself. Okay, I made that part up, but he seriously broke into a barn to bang a min-horse. Take that in for a second. Some of you might be thinking that's pretty gross. I'm thinking, "Wow, this guy, must be hung like a horse!" How could a human penis even fit into a horse, mini or regular sized. 

     Wagner was arraigned this past Monday morning and released on only $5,000 unsecured bail. The burglary charge, a second degree felony, carries a maximum penalty of not more than 10 years in prison. The sexual intercourse with an animal charge, a second degree misdemeanor, carries a maximum sentence of not more than two years in prison. Wow! So banging an animal only gets you a couple of years in prison? Interesting....and gross!

COCKS NOT GLOCKS?

     I'm sure many of you saw this story yesterday, but in the event that you didn't, here it is. Now, I'm not one to debate anything political because to be honest, I know jack shit about politics. I do know, however, that we are screwed after this election. When it comes to guns, and this is just my opinion, so you debaters looking for a debate can find it somewhere else, I feel people have a right to bear arms to protect themselves in this crazy world, but just like all things in life, there's a time an place for it. Do I think that obtaining a firearm should be a little bit more difficult. Hell yeah! I mean there should be a total psychiatric evaluation when giving someone a gun. That might help lower the bloodshed in America. Again, just the way I feel. 

     That being said, to protest a new state law that makes the carrying of concealed handguns legal in college classrooms, students at the University of Texas on Wednesday openly displayed sex toys, an act considered illegal under local indecency laws. The leader of the protest, Jessica Jin (pictured above) said, "We are fighting absurdity with absurdity. 'Cocks Not Glocks: Campus (Dildo) Carry,' where hundreds of sex toys were given away at the rally on Wednesday that coincided with a return to classes at the university flagship campus. 

     Jin stated, "Texas has decided it is not all obnoxious or illegal to allow deadly concealed weapons on campus, but walking around with a dildo could land you in trouble." On August 1, a so-called "campus carry" law went into effect that allows concealed handgun license holders aged 21 and older to bring handguns into classrooms and other university facilities. The lawmakers said campus carry protects the rights of gun owners and could prevent a mass shooting on campus. Um....I don't know if I agree with that. Yes, it might protect from a mass shooting, but it call also be the cause of a mass shooting because once again, there is no evaluation of gun owners mentally. I definitely do not agree that guns should be allowed on campus or in a classroom. As a student going for my Master's Degree, I just would not feel comfortable with that. Like I said, I'm okay with people carrying, but I don't think it's necessary in a classroom. You might ask, "Well, Tim, when is it necessary?" I would say, "Just not in a classroom!" People are there for an education. Who will be able to concentrate knowing Joe Blow sitting next to you has a gun in his back pack. Say he accidentally forgets to put the safety on and the gun goes off. Oh, well, Debbie Downer sitting in the front row just got her head blown off and she was just here earning her degree. Accidents happen, right? 

     Anyway, hundreds of university faculty and staff lobbied unsuccessfully to block campus carry, arguing the combination of youth, academic stress, alcohol and firearms could make for a deadly combination. I might have to agree with that one. A U.S. district judge on Monday denied a motion from three University of Texas professors who wanted to ban guns in their classroom after the state gave some students that right under the law that went into effect earlier this month. 

     On Wednesday, protests organizers shouted slogans like, "If you are packing the heat, we are packing the meat." That his hilarious! They also handed out hundreds of sex toys donated by area sex shops. They also handed out plastic zip ties so that protesters could strap the sex toys on their backpacks in a sign of defiance against campus carry. Since I'm being honest here, this protest was utterly silly and hilarious, but in all reality, they do have a point as far as carrying guns on campus. It doesn't sound like they're fighting the right to bare arms.....Just the right to bare arms on a college campus. It is pretty funny that they were all carrying around dildos on campus. My question is how many guys actually carried one around? My other question is how many women used their new sex toy after the protest was over? See? I can always take it there.    

CHEECH AND CHONG BABYSITTER'S CLUB

     Welcome to blog number 1000 for me! That means there were 1000 blog posts by me about teacher-student sex, stupid sex mishaps, marijuana use and abuse, rants, and Florida. For those of you who read regularly, I thank you! And I also thank those of you who have reached out on a personal level to tell me you love reading my buzzkill blogs! I keep writing these to keep you entertained....and because the stupidity keep happening! 

     So, what else do I write about for my 1000th blog post? Well, there were no teacher-student sexcapades yet since school starts in two weeks here on the east coast, but so of course there's marijuana! This story will have you up in arms....or at least, up in smoke! 

     Anyway, two dopes from Fort Hall, Idaho, were arrested over the weekend for smoking a joint around a young boy and shotgunning the smoke into his mouth. For those wondering what "shotgunning" is, a "friend" told me it was the art of inhaling the joint or cigarette and then blowing it into a willing participant's mouth, so they can inhale the smoke. In this case, it was a little boy! What the hell is wrong with people? 

     Here's the kicker, the women thought what they were doing was so funny, they decided to post a video of it on Facebook. Needless to say, the video went viral. I'm sure it went viral because people were mortified by it and not because it was hilarious. The video actually had me cringing. 

     One woman in the video says to the boy, "You getting high? He's high, he's off blazing it!" The same woman can then be seen taking a photo of the child. The two women in the video were arrested for child endangerment. The Fort Hall Police Department said investigators are currently requesting warrants for the remaining two adults in the video, which has since been removed. As the investigation is ongoing, Fort Hall Police say they won't release any further info, including the adults' relation to the child. 

     I have to say that this kid is going to grow up pretty messed up, for sure. I mean these people are trash. To be honest, I am one who likes to partake, and I would never do this to a child. I wouldn't even do it to a pet. It's a waste of good weed! Just kidding! It can really mess a child up. Then again, if my babysitter molested me or blew pot smoke in my face, I might be okay with that. But that's me! I'm already screwed up in the head! Now, I'm just babbling! Take a look at this video footage and thank you again, for always reading my ramblings!

IF YOU SMELL LIKE CHICKEN......

     Yes, the summer is coming to an end, but it doesn't mean you still can't go to the beach, right? There's still time to get a glowing tan, and smell like extra crispy fried chicken? Yes, I said extra crispy fried chicken. It turns out, Kentucky Fried Chicken, or KFC as it likes to be called now, is giving away tubes of sunscreen that makes you smell like you've slathered yourself in the Colonel's secret 11 herbs and spices. Um.....I'm not so sure about this. I might want to eat myself. 

     In addition to protecting its customers from the harmful effects of the sun, this bizarre promotion is clearly an effort by KFC to turn sunbathers, swimmers and everyone at the beach into walking subliminally to the food chain for the chain's fried fast food. I guess that's kind of the same tactic Abercrombie and Fitch uses to get customers into their stores. I mean come on. Every time you walk by an A&F store, all you smell is their cologne. It draws people into their stores. 

     In one way, the idea is genius. In another way, it sounds freaking disgusting. Regardless, of how you feel about the promotion, it's not finger licking good! The sunscreen is not edible. The KFC sunscreen doesn't need to be bought or nothing has to be purchased to obtain a tube of this stuff. You just need to cough up all of your personal details like shipping address. If you miss out, you can probably have the same experience by just smearing real fried chicken grease all over your body before heading to the beach. It will also give you the opportunity to get real friendly with the local seagulls. 

     I have to be honest. This is disgusting! But if I was going to use a food-based sunscreen, I think I might hold out for the Big Mac or Quarter Pounder with Cheese sunscreen. Or how about the Chicken McNuggets sunscreen. Now, those are sunscreens I may consider! Who am I kidding? I don't even use sunscreen. This, however, is pretty gross!
   

SILENCE OF THE LAMB

     And we're back to Florida! Shocker, right? This is 19-year-old Austin Harrouff of Tequesta, Florida. He looks like your average American college kid, doesn't he? Would you believe it if I told you he's an ice cold cannibalistic murderer? Well, probably, since he is from Florida. I better stop making fun of Florida before I'm not allowed back into the state. I actually love Florida. 

     Anyway, Harrouff was having dinner with his family on Monday night, when he suddenly grew angry and stormed out of the restaurant, killed two people, then ate one of the victim's face off. Yes, I said, "ate one of the victim's face off!" Moments after Harrouff stormed out of the restaurant, police responded to a 911 call of a stabbing attack and arrived to find Harrouff biting off part of the dead man's face in the driveway of the victim's home in Tequesta. The man's wife was found dead in the garage and a neighbor suffered multiple stab wounds. 

     Harrouff was charged with a double homocide and taken to a nearby hospital, where he remained unconscious. People and hospital workers have completed some tests, but have not yet found any evidence of drug use. According to the Martin County Sheriff's Department, "He was a good kid. He had no criminal record." They also continued that Harrouff also had no apparent relationship to his victims and that the attack seemed to be completely random. The victims were identified as 59-year-old John Stevens and his wife, 53-year-old Michelle Mischcon, who are now survived by daughter Ivy Stevens.

     The Sheriff says that there is not one thing in this case that makes any sense. Harrouff does not fit the typical description of a deranged murderer. He was a star high school football player and excellent student taking advanced placement classes in the International Baccalaureate programs at school. He was home fore the weekend visiting family and some of his fraternity brothers. 

     The teen was eating dinner with his family in a local sports bar when he grew enraged by something, like the service, and stormed out of the eatery. He walked a few blocks in the direction of his father's house and came across Stevens and Mischcon sitting in their garage with the door open, which is what they did every evening, according to neighbors. Harrouff allegedly just attacked the couple using multiple weapons, including a knife and other blunt objects, killing them both. A neighbor attempted to stop the boy, but the teen turned to him and said, "You don't want any of this," before attacking him with a knife as well. The neighbor escaped to call 911. He is currently undergoing surgery with non-life threatening injuries. 

     When deputies arrived, they found Harrouff crouched over Stevens, grunting and growling like an animal, and eating his face. After attempting to subdue Harrouff with a stun gun and K-9 to no effect, three to four police officers managed to pull the college sophomore from the body and place him under arrest and heavy sedation.

     The Sheriff's Department said the preliminary tests have found no drugs in his system, but he wouldn't be surprised if more in depth testing finds evidence of the Flakka drug, technically known as alpha-PVP, a strong, synthetic, psychoactive stimulant similar to "bath salts." Okay, that's pretty crazy! This attack was similar to another famous Florida case from 2012, where bath salts were attributed to a man eating a homeless man's face, but police, at the time, only found marijuana in his system. Man, this Zombie Apocalypse is going to be here before you know it. It can all start from a stupid man-made drug called Flakka! What the hell? 

HE WAS JUST TRYING TO STOP HER FROM SEEING HER EX

    
     What would you do if you didn't want your other half traveling to visit an ex? Well, why would they be traveling to visit an ex in the first place? Secondly, if they loved you enough, they wouldn't be traveling to see them once they realized it really bothered you, right? 

     Well, this Queens man, Danesh Gomanie, took it to a whole new level. He was willing to do anything for love, including even calling in a bomb threat at JFK Airport to stop his girl from seeing her ex-husband. Gomanie, 33, a mechanic at an aviation company located in JFK, allegedly dialed 911 on July 27 at 10 am under the name "Singh", telling the operator a woman would be "carrying a bomb and/or drugs" the next night on Caribbean Airlines Flight 527.

     FBI agents were able to trace the call to Gomanie's cell phone. The lovesick prank caller admitted he made the threat because he was upset that she was flying to Guyana and was "fearful that she might reunite with her ex-husband who lived there."

     Okay, so maybe not all of the morons are in Florida. I guess some are still here in NYC. Why would you jeopardize your whole life and your job over a girl? If she's traveling to see her ex, she's doing it with or without your consent anyway. Now what? She probably broke up with your ass for being so insecure. You now have a criminal record because of your stupid bomb threat stunt. And worst of all, you might be out of a job. How does that feel, Danesh? Now, you have nothing! And it was all over a girl, who might have wanted to just go home to Guyana and would probably have not seen her ex. 

     Gomanie appeared Tuesday in Brooklyn federal court and was released on $20,000 bail. Oh, and now you're out $20,000.....over a girl! I bet you wish you could take back that phone call now. 

THE HONEY-LESS HONEYMOONER!

     This morning, I was going to write about that stripper golf outing in Jersey, where the strippers did lap dances on golf carts and groped the golfers junk in broad daylight while playing golf and raising money for a good cause. But it seemed there were a lot of people who posted that story on Facebook yesterday. So, this story that I did choose to write about irritated me so much that it needs to be told. 

     By definition, a honeymoon is the traditional holiday taken by newlyweds to celebrate their marriage in intimacy and seclusion. The keywords here are newlyweds and marriage. Well, this is Faizan Patel, an Indian photographer, who is enjoying a fabulous Italian honeymoon without his "honey." Why? You ask? That's because just two days before Faizan and his wife, Sana, were supposed to leave for their two-week trip, she realized she had lost her passport. Faizan went on the trip anyway, and kind of kept his wife with him. Yeah, no. My wife would kill me if I went on OUR honeymoon without her. Plus, is it really a honeymoon when your "honey" isn't with you? It's basically a vacation alone.

     On Monday, Faizan tweeted out a photo of himself, traveling with Sana's photo placed over an empty seat. My wife would kill! I would not be alive today writing for you guys. Then again, my wife and I work as a team, and we are on top of our travel documents before we travel and make sure we have everything in place, especially our passports on OUR honeymoon. That's just irresponsible. I also would have postponed the trip until my wife got her new passport, but that's just me (and I'm sure people who think properly).

     Faizan tweeted, "This is how I am traveling with my wife as of now." The tweet was seen by Sushma Swaraj, India's minister of external affairs. Sound like someone who can get something done? Yes, she was! Swaraj tweeted back to Faizan to have his wife contact her immediately. I little later, Swaraj said a duplicate passport would be issued and Sana will be able to make it to Italy after all. Or so everyone thought! Although, Sana had her hands on a new passport, Faizan said she won't be able to get a visa until after the honeymoon was over in two weeks. That sucks!

     The couple got married back in December and took a "mini-honeymoon" to an Indian national park, but Italy was supposed to be the real honeymoon. Faizan told CNN, "This trip was entirely planned by her. I wish to see her next to me soon." Hey, dummy! That's even more of a reason not to go without her! You should have got your money back or rescheduled your reservations. I'm sure if you explained the situation, all parties involved would have understood. As a man, I'm not sure I would have enjoyed a honeymoon without my wife and posting pictures of me and photo of my bride would have been a slap in the face to her. Honestly, I can't believe she didn't beat his ass. 


     That being said, Faizan isn't the first person to go on his honeymoon with his "honey." Apparently, Huma Mobin, a woman from Pakistan, posted photos of her husband-less honeymoon in Greece earlier this summer. Huma's photos show her exploring the wonders of Greece, with her right arm wrapped around a husband who wasn't there, because he couldn't get a visa from the Greek embassy. How is this okay? I don't get it! If my wife left me behind on a trip we planned together, I would be pretty pissed to. I would expect her to wait until my visa was good to go. If you ask me, these people who left their spouses behind are self-centered. Then again, maybe we don't know the full story. Maybe they wouldn't get a refund, but either way, they're losing half the money they spent on these trips, right? I don't know. It just sounds nuts to go on a honeymoon when you're a newlywed without your other half. I know for sure that my wife wouldn't have it and vice versa. 

NO KIDS ALLOWED!

     When I was a kid, I know there were sexual adult jokes thrown around among the adults at family parties, but I never knew what they really meant. It wasn't until I hit my teens anyway. That being said, this story was a little strange because I don't think I've ever seen this happen at a family get together. 

     So, this game, in which a young woman kneels in front of a male party guest while eating a banana from between his legs simulating fellatio, was filmed by another party guest. The video, however, which was shot in Kazakhstan (Yes, the home of Borat!), provoked much outrage after it was uploaded to social media sites and internet forums, where it quickly went viral. Why the outrage? Well, viewers were offended that the game was staged in front of young children. See the pic. 

     A girl believed to be around three or four-years-old can be seen playing with a balloon while watching the bizarre sex game. In the video clip, the woman holds her hands behind her back while eating the banana from the lap of the man who is sitting in a chair. Guests at, what is believed to be a wedding, can be heard laughing at their antics while the man looks particularly pleased with himself. The video provoked a heated debate online where many users said they had been disgusted by what they saw.

     One viewer replied: "This is just awful and disgusting, our society is sick and to save ourselves from extinction we need to take some action." I'm not sure what they meant by that. Extinction? I clearly don't think a child seeing a sex act has anything to do with extinction. To be honest, I'm not sure where all the outrage is coming from. Yes, the child might have witnessed the simulated sex act, but at that age, does she really know what is going on? Will she even remember seeing it? I highly doubt it. I understand that young minds are easily manipulated, but can any of you tell me anything that you remember from the age of 3 or 4? I know I can't.

   

THIS IS BAAAAAAAAAAD!

     This guy either looks like the second coming of Freddy Krueger or Bad Grandpa. The way this story goes, though, you might want to say the latter. This is 65-year-old, Freddie Wadsworth from Douglasville, Georgia. He was arrested last Friday for....Get ready for it....Having sex with a goat! That is so baaaaaaad! 

     Wadsworth's neighbors were looking out their window when they saw him having "indecent" relations with a white female goat. One of the shocked witnesses picked up the phone and dialed 911 to report a "male having intercourse with a goat," according to TheSmokingGun.com.

     Police initially logged the arrest as indecent exposure because there's no police code for getting it on with a goat, or bestiality. The occurrence happened in broad daylight on Wadsorth's property. Sergeant Ashley Henson of the Paulding County Sheriff's Office said, "He has a lot of goats." Maybe Wadsworth is Greek. Don't they bang goats? Or is it sheep? I mean, take a look at this goat. How can you blame him? I'm only kidding! Um, ew!

     Wadsworth was eventually booked into the county jail on a bestiality charge and released on a $1,300 bond. If convicted, he could face up to five years behind bars. Here's what I don't get....If he had a lot of goats, this can't be the first time that he found one attractive. This is the first time that he got caught, however. My question is, how many times has this guy banged his goats before he got caught? Apparently, he banged this goat like it was natural. He was just dumb enough to do it in broad daylight this time. Note to self: Don't bang your pets in broad daylight! 

CANINE WINE....IT'S A THING!

     This is more a story for my wife than anything, but my fellow dog lovers will love this also. So, my wife loves our dogs, wine and me, in no particular order. She has become a connoisseur of all three and will love this blog!

     Do you remember back in the day, you would purposely spill some of your adult beverage on the floor so your furry friend can come over and lap it all up? Well, now there's a doggy beverage to cure all that. Back in June, we celebrated a new wine for cats, leaving dog lovers out in the cold, and sure there are some beer for dogs on the market, but what about the canines with more sophisticated tastes? 

     Brandon Zavala, founder of the Denver-based pet wine company Apollo Peak said, "We always planned on doing something for dogs. Dogs are more patient." Unlike their owners anyway. When cat wine exploded in popularity, Zavala said the dog people quickly demanded their own versions.

     Zavala's company introduced ZinFanTAIL and CharDOGNay, which is now available in 12 oz. bottles for pre-order online. Like the wines for cats, the canine versions don't contain any alcohol or grapes, which are both dangerous for pets. They get their wine-like coloring from beet juice. While the feline wines rely on catnip to produce a stimulating effect, the dog beverages are made with brewed peppermint or chamomile to help calm the pups down. 

     Zavala said that the drinks are more of a relaxant and that they'll get more mellow, which is kind of what wine does to humans. Oh no wait. That's weed! Although the American Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals lists chamomile as potentially toxic to pets, the group confirmed that occasionally consuming it is unlikely to harm a dog. The ASPCA Poison Control Center stated that the problems with chamomile usually arise after daily ingestion and are usually limited to cats. 

     Zavala always recommends that pet owners check with their own vet before giving his company's products to their cat or dog. But once you get the thumbs up, feel free to kick back and have a drink with your canine pal. I'm sure after reading this my wife will be ordering cases of this stuff, which will leave me as the only person in our house who doesn't drink. What will they think of next? Doggy blunts? It will help with their eye sight, appetite and aches and pains. Now, that would be awesome! 

COCKAINE?

     Okay, so confused about my title? You won't be after I tell what this guy did. You may even give him an "A" for effort, but so disgusted with him that you may want to slap him. 

     Anyway, it's not a stretch to say that the foreskin isn't the first place one would think of hiding drugs, when trying to smuggle it. However, when you're naked in a parking lot, and you're about to be arrested, you find ways to improvise. At least, that's what Joshua Hare did. 

     Police in Swindon, UK, said they found 7.2 grams of cocaine stuffed into the 24-year-old's foreskin. Yes, his foreskin! How the hell does one do that? What did he do? Pull the skin back and hide it underneath? Um, ouch!

     The incident happened back on June 17 when Swindon police were called to a furniture store after getting calls of a man shouting and disturbing customers in the parking lot. When the officers arrived, Hare was naked and put up a struggle before he was taken into custody and taken to a local hospital. While in custody, a baggie containing white powder began to "emerge" from his foreskin. Wait! Was he getting hard in the the back of a police car? 

     Hare's attorney told the court that his client has a troubled background, substance abuse problems, possible mental health issues and suffered kidney issues when he was taken into police custody earlier this year after being arrested for aggravated theft of a vehicle without consent. Hare was in court back in May to answer the vehicle theft charges and was given a suspended sentence at that time.

     On Tuesday, Hare pleased guilty to both the drug charge and failing to surrender to bail. His attorney hoped magistrates would take his client's troubled background into consideration when sentencing his client. Hare was activated with a 12-week suspended sentence and slapped with a $151 fee. 

     Can we go back to the foreskin thing, though? How the hell did he do it? How can you fit it in there? It's not like the foreskin is a enough skin to hold pockets. Unless, he was uncircumcised. That's the only explanation. Then you can fit a whole kilo in your penis! Either way, "WTF?"

GENE SIMMONS WHO?

     The legend that is Gene Simmons from Kiss might be getting put to the test this week as Gerkary Bracho from Ocala, Florida shows off her lengthy licker on YouTube. I guess Florida is not only full of dummies. They have some freaks too! 
      All kidding aside, licking your own elbow is supposed to be one of life's impossibilities, but not for Bracho, who can do it with no problems at all. The Venezuelan native can be seen performing some bizarre tongue-twisting tricks via YouTube and they're tricks that might even make Gene Simmons from Kiss blush. The Demon from Kiss has a legendary tongue that is said to have pleasured many women in his time. I'm sure Bracho's boyfriend is very pleased as well. Wow! 

      In one video she opens her mouth and extends her tongue way below her chin. She then turns to her side and curls her muscle up to lick the tip of her nose. Then she shows that she can pick her nose, stuffing her tongue up both her nostrils. The contortionist then pulls her tongue out as far as it can go with her hand, showing it is as stretchy as it is long. 

     She then touches both ears with the tip of her tongue before extending it so far that she licks her own eye. I'm gagging just thinking about trying it. Bracho must have amazing gag reflexes. And for her finale in the video, she licks her own elbow before sexily winking at the camera. 
      Bracho has not published the exact length of her tongue and she currently does not hold the official record. Gene Simmons doesn't even hold the record. According to Guinness Book of World Record, the longest tongue belongs to 26-year-old Nick Stoeberl from Salinas, California, who's tongue measured in at 3.97 inches from the tip to the middle of the closed top lip. That record was recorded back on November 27, 2012. 

     These photos don't do Bracho's tongue any justice. You have to see her tongue in action through the YouTube video. I'm still in awe! Check it out!