I
originally wanted to write a rambling today about how people think they own the
whole road when they drive, but when I picked up the paper and read this story,
I thought that it was incredibly sad. So, I figured I'd ruin your day by
sharing this story with you. The girl in the photo above is 28-year-old Grace
Sung Eun Lee. She was a financial manager at Bank of America, she was living in
Manhattan and training to run the New York City marathon last year, when a
month before the race, she fell ill and doctors found a tumor in brain stem.
She would move to back her parents' Douglaston, Queens’ home while she received
radiation and chemotherapy treatment. She regained some of her strength by the
summer, but was still so ill that she could hardly move.
On
September 3, Grace had a seizure and she was rushed to North Shore Hospital in
Long Island, where doctors put her on a ventilator and inserted a feeding tube.
Her brain tumor had resurfaced and she was given months, or even weeks, to
live. On September 18, doctors tried to remove the breathing tube to see if she
could breathe on her own, but she couldn't. Since then Grace has been paralyzed
from the neck down tethered to breathing and feeding tubes, but that didn't
stop her from recently mouthing four words that have cause quite a tug-of-war
between the her parents and the hospital. Grace said, "I want to
die!"
The
doctors at North Shore are trying to honor Grace's wish, but her devout parents
believe that removing the tubes is suicide, a sin that would condemn her to
hell. Grace's parents, who are immigrants from Korea, have gone to court to
keep their terminally ill daughter from pulling the plug. The case has
virtually put medical ethics and religion on a collision course with lawyers
arguing in two courtrooms while she lays there and can't do more than blink her
eyes. Grace's father, Reverend Manho Lee, a prominent Queens pastor, pleaded to
the judge, "The thought of her dying, my heart tremors, everything goes
black." Grace's mother, Jin-ah Lee, doesn't believe that her always
dutiful daughter has given up on life, or that her death is inevitable, even
though, doctors are saying that it is. Her mother went on to say that Grace was
depressed and not in her right mind.
At
a recent hearing, a judge ruled that Grace Lee was indeed competent after
listening to both sides. She is on medications, including morphine, and Ativan,
but her doctors say the dosage isn't high enough to affect her reasoning. The
hospital had a psychiatrist assess Grace, and he found her capable of making
medical choices. The judge went on to say that this was a difficult decision
and that his heart goes out to the Lees saying, "I feel your sorrow, I
feel your pain, and I wish certainly that your daughter will recover and should
recover, although that is unlikely.....I need to vacate the temporary
restraining order and let things move through their other natural course and
put Miss Lee in the hands of God."
The
Lees appealed the court's decision immediately. The tubes will remain in place
until a panel of judges weighs in. To be quite honest, this is a difficult
decision! If I was suffering like Grace was, I would hope that my family would
have the sense to just pull the plug because if I survive, I will never be the
same and that would be more of a hell than the hell that you say I would go to
if they did pull the plug. If Grace has lost her will to live, I think the
parents should respect her wishes. Yes, it's hard to let your daughter go, but
it's better than watching her suffer. This story was just too sad with no happy
ending in sight!
