HALF-SACK DEAD AT 28

Yesterday, I read news about a former Sons of Anarchy star dying on Kurt Sutter's personal Facebook page. He's the creator of Sons of Anarchy. Anyway, this tragic tale comes off the heels of a shocking Sons of Anarchy favorite, Opie, getting killed off the show. The day after the shocking show events, Sutter posted about his former star: "It was a tragic end for an extremely talented guy, who unfortunately had lost his way. I wish I could say that I was shocked by the events last night, but I was not." Well, I didn't know the extent of actor Johnny Lewis's demise until I read about it this morning, and I'm just blown away that this talented actor lost his way the way that he did. I also didn't know that he was pop-diva, Katy Perry's ex!

Anyway, according to sources, Lewis, who played the one-testicled biker-gang- wanna-be "Half-sack" on the show Sons of Anarchy, killed his 81-year-old landlady Catherine Chabot David, dismembered her cat, and plummeted off a roof to his death in Los Angeles on Wednesday night. Seems like he might've taken Opie's death on the show a little too hard, but the fact is Lewis' bizarre rampage was fueled by a popular new synthetic drug called Smiles. Friends say that Lewis had been on a downward spiral since his glory days of dating the buxom singer. 

After Lewis offed the old lady, he fled the killing hopping fences and climbing onto the roof of the sprawling Spanish-style home where he rented a room after getting out of jail on an assault rap last week. Police said that by the time they arrived, Lewis was already dead on the driveway after either leaping or falling from the rooftop. Katy Perry is said to be devastated over his death. Lewis' acting career spanned 12 years and included a movie role in 2007's Alien vs. Predator-Requiem, and recurring TV roles on The O.C., American Dream, and Sons of Anarchy. 

  Despite his glamorous career, Lewis spent of this year behind bars and even spent some time in a Scientology rehab center. He was convicted in August for separate crimes from earlier this year for smashing a man in the head with a bottle in January and for a burglary in February. His sentences were reduced because of jail overcrowding and because he did court-ordered rehab. It's sad to see talented people like this get engulfed in the glamorous hell known as Hollywood. Then again only the weak-minded will allow themselves to get swallowed up but it. Either way, this is still a sad story!

THE LATEST FAD IN JAPAN IS BECOMING A BAGEL HEAD?

A friend of mine posted this on Facebook yesterday, and at first, I thought that it was a Photoshop joke. Then, this morning I see it in the newspaper as the latest fad to hit Japan. Apparently, the body art fanatics in Japan are bored of getting tattoos and piercings, so now, the kids are getting their kicks from what they call "bagel-heading"! Say it with me now, "What the F**k?" 

This new trend and bizarre look is achieved by pumping saline into the forehead until a large welt forms. How is this good for your body? Then again, is putting ink into your skin exactly healthy? Anyway, the practitioner then presses a finger in the lump, giving it a shape that looks like a bagel. Anyone hungry?

 A segment on a TV show called Taboo on the National Geographic Channel showed one brave young trio giving the procedure a shot in a Tokyo clinic. One of the participants said that it felt like something was dripping down his head as a thin tube of nearly 400 cc's of saline is pumped into his face. Two hours after the gloved practitioner set their thumb into the swollen saline bubble, the young man grabs for a mirror, and after looking at himself, stated "I look delicious!"

According to one website, the procedure is not permanent and the bagel bump usually deflates in about a day as the body absorbs the saline. One magazine said that saline injections and bagel-heading was created out of the extreme body modification scene and first came to Tokyo in 2007. I thought that I've seen it all, but this tops off the cake for me! These people look like aliens! As if being Asian, like myself, wasn't alien-looking enough, they had to come up with this body modification? Why not bagel-penising or something like that? This way you don't have to walk around looking like you belong on Star Trek and the only person who sees your bagel penis is the person you're with! If they wanted to say that it looked delicious, then even better! Bagel-heading? No, thank you!   

BUTT CHUGGING ANYONE?

Okay, either I'm really old, or kids today are getting dumber! Has anyone reading this right now ever heard of "butt chugging"? Apparently, a 20-year-old college student from the University of Tennessee was rushed to the hospital after guzzling large amounts of alcohol through his anus. Yes, I said, "Through his anus!"

The university's fraternity, Pi Kappa Alpha that hosted the boozy stunt has been suspended for 30 days until a decision is made about the chapter's future. Alexander Broughton, a member of the fraternity, was taken to the medical center in Knoxville early Saturday morning after he was found unresponsive. The medical facility determined that Broughton, who is actually from Memphis, was suffering from alcohol poisoning with a blood-alcohol level at a life-threatening .40. Broughton was said to have been treated and released over the weekend. 

Knoxville Police said that the fraternity had allegedly conducted "alcohol enemas," which involved pouring drinks through a rubber tube inserted into the rectum. Did your sphincter just clench like mine did after reading that? What is wrong with people? Apparently, the abundance of capillaries of blood vessels (in the rectum) greatly heightens the level and speed of alcohol entering the blood stream as it bypasses the filtering by the liver. 

 Officials don't believe that the drinking was an act of hazing since Broughton was neither a pledge nor a new student at the university. Alcohol Enemas is apparently not something new either! In 2004, a Texas man died after his wife allegedly gave him a sherry enema. WTF? Charges were dropped on the wife because prosecutors couldn't prove that she was even responsible for his death. At the time, she said that her husband was addicted to alcohol enemas! How can anyone be addicted to alcohol enemas or any enemas for that matter? The only phrase that keeps coming to mind when I read this story is, "Rectum? Damn Near Killed Him!" Seriously! What is this world coming to? Anyone up for a Sake Bomb Enema? WTF?   

ANOTHER FLIGHT ATTENDANT CAUGHT RED-HANDED

When I travel, I always keep my belongings close by. Especially, after hearing horror stories like this one. We've heard stories of TSA guards stealing iPads, iPhones, and laptops, but this is the first time that I've read that an app helped someone locate their stolen iPad.

 

Here's what happened; a Nevada man lost his iPad on flight home to Reno, Nevada. So, he used an app called Find My iPad to locate it inside the Oregon home of a flight attendant on his flight! Unbelievable! Sometimes I can't believe the balls that some people have on them! Police officers in Oregon City, Oregon, right outside of Portland, arrested 43-year-old Wendy Ronelle Dye this past Friday evening. 

 

The flight attendant for Horizon Air....Um, what airline is that?....Anyway, Dye allegedly told the officers that a passenger brought her the tablet saying it was found on a seat. She swore that she never used the iPad and planned to turn it over to airline officials. Here's a question for Dye, why didn't you just turn it in when you got off the plane and why did you bring the iPad home with you if you never intended to use it? Oh, by the way, police found some of her personal information on the iPad including her husband's birthday, but she never intended to use it. Was this all worth it? Over an iPad? Really? 

 

Arrangements are being made to return the tablet to its rightful owner in Reno and Dye has been suspended from the airline. I have to be honest, she'll be lucky if a suspension is all she gets. I just can't get over the balls that people have on them! And like I said, I'd love to ask Miss Dye if the iPad was worth losing her job and a criminal record now? Oh, well! Not my problem I guess! 

I NOW PRONOUNCE YOU FATHER AND WIFE? WHAT?

The woman to my left is Valerie Spruill from Doylestown, Ohio. She seems like a happy woman, right? Well, wait until you hear her story! It turns out; Valerie discovered that the man she married actually fathered her! Yes, you read correctly! In other words, her late husband was also her father! Valerie learned of her husband's identity six years after he passed away in 1998 when an uncle eventually came forward with the truth. She's coming out with her story now to inspire those going through a rough time. You know what this story inspires me to think? WTF?

Here's a little back story on this situation; Valerie's mother and father, Percy Spruill, first started dating when he was 15. It's unclear as to how many children they had together, but Valerie says that she is aware of six brothers. Valerie's grandmother started taking care of her when she was 3-months-old, but it wasn't until she was 9 when she discovered the first of many secrets within her family. She learned that the man she believed was her father was actually her grandfather. She would also learn that a woman who said she was a family friend was actually her mother! I hope Tyler Perry is reading this! It makes for a great movie!

Valerie's mom, Christine, passed in 1984. Valerie confirmed that Percy was her father with the help of a DNA test in 2004. She says that she can't say for certain whether he was aware of the extent of their relationship, though she believes he did know and was simply afraid to tell her. Valerie is still seeing a therapist to come to terms with this difficult revelation. She also hopes that her decision to go public will help her find more of her siblings!

I have a revelation! How about the fact that within those years of marriage, she was having sex with her father! How come no one's mentioned that yet? This whole article has been about finding her other siblings, but in reality, this whole revelation is extremely disturbing! Like I said, Tyler Perry, get that screenplay ready! If done right, this should be an amazing movie!

WHAT A JACKASS!

This smiley-faced guy on my left seems harmless, but truth be told, he's a sick f**k! Those of you who aren't into hearing or reading things about beastiality, I would suggest that you stop reading right about now. Unless, of course, you're a bit curious, then read on! 

So, it turns out; a frisky farm hand was arrested recently for telling police that he masturbated with a donkey, and he vowed in court on Tuesday that he will get his burro back. 31-year-old Carlos Romero says that there has to be due process here since he paid $500 for the 21-month-old female donkey, but Marion County officials want custody of the miniature donkey named Doodle, and plan to put her up for adoption. The animal was said be in good shape after the alleged abuse. 

Romero pleaded not guilty to charges of sexual activity involving an animal and animal cruelty. His bail was set at $2,000 and he was put in Marion County Jail. Romero was arrested on Monday at an Ocala farm after the farm's proprietor told the police about the August Incident. The proprietor said that he was delivering a horse when he allegedly saw Romero shirtless with his pants pulled down, appearing to have had sex with a donkey in the equipment room. When authorities interviewed Romero, he told them that he used his fingers to clean the animal's genitals and generally becomes aroused seeing animals in heat. What the hell? The sexual contact, he supposedly told police, was an accident. Police said that Romero also admitted to masturbating with the animal five or six times and he had the balls to call Florida 'backwards' because people frown on zoophilia, just a another word for beastiality.

 In another interview, Romero said that he has 'never been a people person' and that he's always had an attraction for horses. He went on to say, "I've had sexual excitement with animals more than humans....I would've eventually had sex with Doodle, but I didn't because she's blooming into maturity." What a sicko! It gets better! Romero believes that the farm's proprietor should be arrested for invasion of privacy and being a "Peeping Tom." I swear! Some people are absolutely sick! Just for one day, I'd love to see through Romero's eyes! I'm sure everything he sees looks like the board game Candyland! Poor sick bastard!      

SUBWAY GETS AWAY WITH NO JAIL TIME!

What would you do if you were on the subway and some guy just started rubbing up against you in a sexual manner, and then you look down and he's masturbating on you? Well, if you were a guy, you'd probably punch the guy in the face, right? If you were a girl, you'd probably scream your head off and probably smack the guy, right? Let me tell you something else! If you were a New York state judge, you would let the culprit go with a slap on the wrist! That's right! Masturbating on the subway is apparently okay when it comes to the legal system in New York! 

It turns out; 27-year-old, Darnell Hardware (got to love that name!) got only three years probation last week because Court of Appeals judges ruled earlier this year that 'subway grinders' can't be charged with felonies if they don't use force to pursue repulsive perversion. In other words, even though, it's absolutely disgusting, it's not a violent act. Um, yes it is! They're beating their meat in public! That can be pretty violent! And let's not forget they're squirting bodily fluids on pedestrians! There has to be a law against that! How about the fact that it's unsanitary! Prosecutors say that dozens of subway psychos have walked away from charges that could have carried up to seven years since the high court's March ruling. 

In Hardware's case, the pervert had a rap sheet that included 32 arrests, including two sexual assault cases in the Bronx and Brooklyn. The recent subterranean charges stemming from three incidents in Manhattan between 2003 and 2005, when Hardware rubbed himself to orgasm on two young women aged 22 and 24, and a 17-year-old high school student. Hello? He beat off on a 17-year-old student? No law against that either? How can New York allow these 'subway grinders' to get away with this? If my girlfriend was on the subway, and Hardware rubbed one off on her, you can bet your ass that I would hunt this guy down and probably commit my own crime on him! And of course, I would go to jail because it would be considered violent, but what he does isn't considered as provoking violence! I don't get it!

City Councilman Peter Vallone Jr. reached out to Albany to close the loophole, and put these convicted grinders on a state sex offenders list! I would have to agree with the Councilman for once!