BEAT OFF IN WALMART

I'm not sure why this cracks me up, but I found myself laughing out loud after reading this story. It goes to show how sick I really am I guess. Anyway, this is Brian Hounslow from Tulsa, Oklahoma. He was recently arrested for allegedly masturbating in the women's bathroom at a Tulsa Walmart. His one-man show was interrupted by an older lady who discovered the naked Hounslow at around 8:30 am. 

61-year-old Beth Davis told police that she entered the restroom yesterday morning and found a nude man pleasuring himself in front of a mirror. Wait a minute! So, this dude was tossing off to an image of himself? Now, that is a little disturbing! Nevermind that he was masturbating, but he was looking at himself and doing it. What the hell? Davis, who fled the bathroom in search of help, said she later, saw the suspect, who at this point was now dressed, leaved the bathroom and headed for the exit. That's when Davis went into 'panic mode' and began filming him with her cell phone, while providing narration to accompany the footage: "My name is Beth Davis and I witnessed it. You were naked and had your pants down to your ankles. Someone stop him. Do not let him got out that door!" The 22-second clip showed up on thesmokinggun.com. I will attach the video below this blog.

 

When Hounslow finally got away from Davis, another shopper photographed his vehicle and its license plate. Within two hours, Tulsa police picked Hounslow up and arrested him for felony indecent exposure. He was booked into the county jail and was being held in lieu of a $5000 bond. He eventually confessed to sex crime detectives that he'd be masturbating in the Walmart bathroom. The report also noted that Davis, a grandmother of eight, saw Hounslow's "fully exposed rigid penis." Davis said that he tried to apologize when she caught him, but she was too confused as to if she walked into the women's bathroom or not. Either way, this shouldn't happen in a men's bathroom either. If I saw this guy masturbating in the men's bathroom, it would have been time to play the game Knockout! I just don't get what makes people do what they do. The best part of the story is this video though! Can you imagine this 61-year-old lady yelling at a sex offender in the middle of a Walmart? Check this out:

HYPER WHAT? THAT WORKED?

We've heard all of the stories about killers or wrongdoers getting their sentences lessened because they would claim temporary insanity, but this is something I've never heard before and it actually worked! So, this is Kathleen Cawthorne. She's a 33-year-old Virginia high school teacher, who, believe it or not, slept with one of her students. Here's the kicker, though; she will only be spending four months out of her 11-year sentence behind bars after she was diagnosed with hypersexuality. WHAT? Does that mean she's a sex addict? What the hell is hypersexuality?

The Wikipedia definition of "hypersexuality" is extremely frequent or suddenly increased sexual urges or sexual activity. Mental health problem such as bipolar disorders can give rise to hypersexuality. So, wait a minute, this teacher got away with statutory rape because she was diagnosed with this disorder? Then why can't all the other teachers who had sex with young boys get away with the same disorder? I mean, I'm sure they were going through the same thing. Rapists too! I'm sure they too were suffering from hypersexuality because they too have sudden increased sexual urges. I'm not saying rape is good! My point is that she committed a crime and should serve out here term. It shouldn't be cut down to four months because she has this disorder. The judicial system is really messed up!

So, Cawthorne will be freed more than a decade early after a judge ruled she could not control the sudden sexual urges that took over her body. Whatever! A court heard how the bipolar teacher seduced a 17-year-old boy at William Combined School in Rustburg, Virginia in March 2012. They texted explicit photos of each other before she picked him up and drove him to a field where they had sex. When officials at the school became suspicious, she was arrested. At a hearing in January, Cawthorne pleaded no contest to one charge of indecent liberties with a child and three counts of electronic solicitation of a minor. Then, last Thursday, Campbell County Circuit Judge John T. Cook sentenced her to a total of 11 years behind bars, but suspended all but four months of that prison time after she apologized for her actions and he heard of her debilitating condition. Cawthorne, whose husband stood by her throughout the hearing, will also have to register as a sex offender. 

So, her husband stuck by her even though he knew she banged a 17-year-old boy? He's an idiot! My other question is "was this 17-year-old boy blind?" Or was he really desperate? If I was going to bang one of my teachers, I certainly would've picked a better looking one. Then again, this never happened back when I was younger, so maybe you take what you can get when you're 17. Nah, I like to think I have some standards. Then again, who am I kidding?

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THIS IS WHY YOU BECOME A SOFTBALL COACH

I only love this story because I have quite a few friends who coach high school girls' sports. I always wondered why they just didn't coach the guys, until today. It turns out this high school softball coach from Seattle's Roosevelt High School has been recently busted for sending his female students out on "scavenger hunts" to pick up cute women for him. Isn't that hysterical? I get it now! Anyway, Troy Hennum has been forced to resign from his role as coach only six days after starting the job when his bosses discovered his sleazy scheme. 

The 25-year-old would order his teenage players to scout "cute girls" and return to him with a photograph and their phone numbers. This guy is a riot! 25-year-old, Kat Aagard said she was approached by a group of giggling schoolgirls when she was at work in her sporting goods store. Thinking that the girls were just being silly and just for fun, she handed the girls her number. Soon after, she began receiving flirty messages from Hennum, whom she initially said, "seemed like a nice enough guy." Yeah, that’s because nice guys send little girls into stores to pick up chicks for him. This guy is a loser! But a pretty funny loser!

Aagard became a little worried when she later Googled Hennum's name only to find out that he'd stopped working at a Lake Washington school in 2012 over claims he'd send inappropriate messages to a student. Hennum was apparently not disciplined, but his contract was also not renewed. Aagard claims that it made her feel uncomfortable and she was completely shocked to see that he had a history of inappropriate behavior. Aagard reported the unusual pick-up method to school bosses, who launched an investigation. Hennum was placed on unpaid leave and resigned last Friday. 

 Here's what I don't understand; was he inappropriate with any of these students? It didn't sound like it. It sounds like he was just using the girls on his team to meet girls his age. When they did find him a girl, that girl blew the whistle on him because of a past experience he had on another school. Why would she do that if he wasn't doing anything wrong? He didn't molest any of the girls at the previous school, so he's not a sex offender. He just sent them messages. Maybe he learned his lesson that time, but this girl never even gave him a chance. She decided to blow the whistle on something he did in his past. I say that Aagard was wrong on this one and Hennum should not have been forced to quit when he did nothing wrong.