MESSAGE IN A BOTTLE?

     And these are the stories we love in my Buzz Kill Ramblings! So, apparently, doctors in Honduras had to amputate a man's penis after it became trapped in a bottle he was using as a sex toy. Yes, he stuck his penis in a bottle! I mean, who hasn't, right? 

     For four days, a 50-year-old man attempted to use the bottle for sexual stimulation, but it wasn't until his penis turned black when he sought our medical attention. Why wouldn't you use a little lube for easy in and out? Just sayin....

     The urologist who conducted the operation said that the man was unmarried and didn't have a girlfriend. In attempting to ease some sexual frustration, "he put his penis in a bottle, and this caused the death and necrosis of the penis." What the hell is necrosis? Necrosis is a condition in which the cells in a portion of the body die and cannot regenerate. It often ends with amputation, as in this case. 

     The doctor said, "When he arrived four days later, we had to amputate the penis completely because it was completely dead. This is an embarrassing emergency. The situation with this patient is that he didn't the medical attention in time, and this caused the penis to begin to decay. It had gone completely black and had begun to decay. The necrosis was very severe."

     Okay, all kidding aside, why would anyone stick there penis in a bottle? Shouldn't they be putting their dick in a box? Sorry, I couldn't resist. This might be one of the most disgusting things I've ever heard. Note to self....No bottles when the wife is away!