A CUT ABOVE THE REST

You would think that getting your penis cut off would have sent you into hiding or at the very least; you would never be able to have normal sex ever again, right? Well, many of you might remember this guy. This is John Wayne Bobbitt and 20 years ago this week, his wife, Lorena, cut off his penis at their home in Virginia and threw it out the window as she drove away. For those of you unfamiliar with this extremely popular story, Bobbitt's penis was later reattached after 10 hours of surgery. Personally, I would've asked for a few extra inches if I was him, but I'm sure the pain made him forget to ask. Anyway, Bobbitt is claiming after 20 years that losing his penis sent his sex life into overdrive. 

The now 46-year-old and one-time porn star says he's bedded more than 70 women since the reattachment of his penis. He says that for some reason "some women got a kick out of saying they slept with John Wayne Bobbitt." Frankly, I can't imagine who would admit to that. Anyway, doctors told Bobbitt that he would never be able to have sex again because his injuries were so bad, but he says he proved them wrong time and time again sleeping with over 70 women since the incident. He went on to say that being the most famous man to have his penis cut off did have its advantages. My guess is that these crazy women wanted to see what this Frankenpenis looked like. It was more curiosity than the fact that they actually wanted to have sex with him.

Bobbitt has been back in the news because this past Sunday was the 20th Anniversary of his ex-wife's infamous snip. The former Marine said he still has nightmares about the kitchen knife attack and the buckets of blood he spilled on the sheets their Virginia bedroom. He said, "People think it's all a big joke but I almost bled to death after the knife sliced through, I lost a huge amount of blood." After the police found the tip of his penis in a field where Lorena had thrown it out her car window, Bobbitt underwent 10 hours of surgery to reattach it. As I sit here writing this, I still squirm whenever I hear this story. Bobbitt remembers waking up in bandages and peeing through a catheter tube for two months. Doctors even warned him that there could be all sorts of complications and worst-case scenario was that infection could set in and it would turn black and fall off. His first roll in the hat came just a few months after his surgery when a woman recognized him and approached him at a bar. At first, he was afraid that his penis wouldn't work, but after doing what came naturally, he knew everything would be alright. It was so alright that he went on to film two pornos, "John Wayne Bobbitt Uncut" and "Frankenpenis".

Bobbitt would continue to have relationship trouble until a few years ago, when he said that he found God and moved to Niagara Falls, NY to settle down. He now lives a quiet life as a limo driver and is planning his fourth marriage. Bobbitt, who is no longer trying to make money off of his name, says he has an autobiography in the works, which will include the accounts of that penis-chopping evening. I have to say that is one book that I won't be buying. This is enough penis-chopping talk for the next 20 years for me.