Originally, I was going to go off on these mothers who aren't worthy of having children. One mother in Kansas left her 2-year-old in a car while she shopped in these record setting hot temperatures. There was another mother from Scotland, who put her 2-year-old down syndrome son inside a washing machine for laughs. Why do we let these people procreate? They should make you take a test before you have sex. Unbelievable!
Besides, my story today is far more disgusting than moronic parents who have horrible parenting skills. So, today, I read about a little festival in County Fermanagh, Northern Ireland called Lady of the Lake Festival, where visitors to the Irvinestown 37th annual event last week were treated to a new event at the festival: a dung-spitting competition. Yes, you read right! A competition for spitting out shit! I mean, while I did hit the topic of parenting, out moms always threatened to wash our potty mouths out with soap, right? These guys might have a better reason to do so.
The event is exactly what it sounds like. Participants took sheep excrement into their mouths and tried to spit it farther than their opponents. Um, what? A local hotelier named Joe Mahon organized this new game for this year's festival. He apparently relished in his role in investigating the dung spitting and even allowed a sheep to crap directly on his face. There is photo for those who disbelieve. I love shitting more than the next person, but this is too much even for me!
Mahon is said to be "known for his quirky ideas during the annual Lady of the Lake festival." By the way, at least six other people joined in the competition. Festival organizers posted on Facebook in June that they were seeking volunteers for the dung contest and that the winner would receive $155 USD. WHAT? I don't think I would even spit shit out of my mouth for a million dollars! While they wrote that the current "world record" (yes, there is a world record for this.) is 5.56 meters, which was set in 2006 by a man in South Africa where they consider dung spitting a sport, the actual record is more likely to be more than 15 meters. I am seriously beside myself, which is tough to do to me, about this whole competition.
Well, aside for the shit spitting, the festival appears to be pretty normal and features a lot of events typically found at a town festival or county fair in the U.S. And of course, a young lady is crowned the "Lady of the Lake." The only thing to make that better is if she also had to compete in the dung spitting competition as part of the Lady of the Lake contest. That would make flying to Ireland for this all worthwhile.