Alright, guys! Be ready to cringe and grab your crotches when you read this story. This one is no fun for anyone, man or woman. In fact, why am I still writing about this?
Anyway, do you remember they say, "Beware of the Black Widow?" Well, apparently in Sydney, Australia, you really need to beware of the Black Widow because of what happened to a 21-year-old construction worker who just went to pee in one of those port-a-johns. Apparently, he was bitten on the penis last Wednesday by a poisonous redback spider, a.k.a. the Black Widow.
According to one story in the Adelaide Advertiser, paramedics rushed to the scene, but the victim was able to get to the hospital on his own despite the bite on his package. Am I the only guy who would leave the venom in me if it made my package swell up to three times it's normal size? Can I get a "Hell Yeah"? Guess not.
The victim has since been released and is in stable condition. Now, he can only hope he has plenty of ice packs and is receiving comforting "sorry about your penis" cards from loved ones.
The female Black Widow has red markings and is toxic. It often lives in urban areas and results in 250 cases a year in Australia that require anti-venom, which was developed in the early 1950s. The venom can cause severe pain, nausea, excessive sweating and even convulsions. It's pretty poetic how the female redbacks are the poisonous ones.
Earlier this month a 22-year-old man was believed to have died from complications from a redback bite, but before that no one was thought to have succumbed to the Black Widow. To be honest, I thought this only happened in movies. Who knew? I guess we all need to "Beware of the Black Widow!"