PILLOW FIGHT = HOT SEX?

     I'm hoping you guys are thanking me after reading this blog. Anyway, are you looking to spice things up in the bedroom with your better half? Have you flipped through The Joy of Sex book for new sexual positions? Have you bought a plethora of sex toys to see what will get her going? I have.....NOT! (How 80s was that?) Look no further! According to Men's Health Magazine, all you have to do is look back to your childhood, those carefree days when activities like pillow fights, truth or dare, Twister and tag ruled the world.

    Sex therapist, Nan Wise, Ph.D says, "Childlike play brings excitement to the relationship, relieves stress and boredom and builds intimacy. I'm talking about that rough-and-tumble play, like wrestling, running around like kids, playing games like touch football, or tag, or Twister." I'm sure she meant naked Twister. 

     For 41-year-old Tracy and her 42-year-old husband Chris, getting into an immature mindset worked for them. Tracy said, "We were in a bed on our computers, in a rut, so I just decided to start a pillow fight. He got a little mad, but he pinned me down, and the next thing you know we're having sex." I think I might need to see video proof of this actually working! Tracy claims that prior to their pillow fight, it had been three weeks since they'd last been intimate. "I'll definitely smack him in the face with a pillow again if needed," she says. Unfortunately, it can also turn into a domestic dispute. I guess it depends on how playful your other half really is. 

     Sex therapist Chris Donaghue, Ph.D, is also a huge fan of adults playing like kids. He says, "We know that working together is beneficial to relationships, so this idea of play is similar, but what play does, as opposed to exercising together, is it let's you be silly with your partner, laugh, let go, be vulnerable and escape a little bit with no rules, judgments or goals." 

     Many childhood games involve play fighting like pillow fights, chicken fights in the pool, tickle fights and water balloon or water gun fights, to name a few. Kait Scalisi, a sex and relationship coach and founder of PassionbyKait.com, relates this type of play to the stress response system: Fight, flight, freeze, feed and fornicate. Um, yeah...That sounds nothing like play fighting into sex. She explains, "If you get hit with a water balloon, for instance, the adrenaline starts running and it defaults to one of these Fs. When couples engage in play fighting like this, it's almost likely to lead to fornicating since there's a heightened sense of intimacy and closeness." 

     Yes, there is a science to all of this. According to Dr. Wise, "The play system is facilitated by our natural opiate neurotransmitters called opioids, which are released during play. The brain's own endogenous cannabinoid system, the naturally occurring marijuana-like chemicals in our brains, are also released during play." I must release that system a lot because I always feel like marijuana chemicals are in my brain!

     I guess there's only one way to test this theory out. Tonight when you're home with your wife or husband or partner, just scream....PILLOW FIGHT!.....And you're welcome!