THIS BUD'S FROM POO!

     Originally, I was going to write about a story sent in from my friend's Brett and Chrissy. They sent me a story from Japan, where kids where poop hats and jump into a giant toilet so they can learn about the importance of a toilet. I thought that was absolutely amazing until I stumbled across this story, which is even shittier! You beer lovers are going to love this one!

     Most who know me, know that I have an allergy to alcohol; therefore, I don't drink. I'm not saying that I never have. I just choose not to so I can avoid all of the allergic reactions I get from drinking anything alcoholic. I know it sounds weird, but ask an Asian friend. Most of them have this problem also, but most choose to drink through it. I'd rather stay sober and make fun of everyone else, or at least, sniff glue to make up for being sober. Anyway, I always thought that beer had a shitty taste anyway, but now the taste of beer in Oregon is about to get even shittier!

     Maybe someday, they'll be able to change slogan from "This Bud's for You" to "This Bud's from Poo." An Oregon government environmental  panel has approved a plan for local brewers to use recycled sewage water, a source of H2O that the group says will be be increasingly necessary due to climate change. That's right! If you drink a beer in Oregon, chances are you are drinking recycled sewage! I'm so happy I don't drink right about now. 

     A utility company called Clean Water Services will give the repurposed water to Oregon Brew Crew, a Portland-based home brewing club that will use the funkified water to highlight the need for new sources of water. It takes an average of five barrels of water to make one barrel of beer, according to Lee Hedgmon, the president of Oregon Brew Crew. She added, "Brewing is a very water-intensive process. I think breweries would benefit from ways to conserve." 

     The salvaged spirit will be tested by health officials, but the Oregon Health Authority says it will be safe because of "the high quality of the treated water, additional microbial reduction in the brewing process, and a low health risk over all." Um, how about the poo particles and whatever else is found in sewage? How the beer will taste is anyone's guess. That's because everyone is afraid to be a guinea pig and try it! Would you try this beer knowing it was made from recycled sewage water? I don't drink, so I can't really answer that question, but if I did? Oh, hell no! 

     Water comprises more than 90 percent of beer and most breweries take great pains to highlight the pristine quality of their water. Doesn't Coors and Coors Light do that? Taste the Rockies? Well, it's also unclear whether consumers will ever drink a product made from recycled waste water anyway, when they can enjoy a cold, clear, mountain runoff. What would they call this beer anyway? Jersey Turnpike?